Ask the Expert: Making Sure Your Subplots Aren’t Sub-Par

Question: How many subplots should I have and how do I make them work with the overall story?

A man can’t live on ‘A’ storylines alone – and neither can your scripts. If you’re not crafting and interweaving compelling subplots and B stories into your script, your story will probably feel flat and won’t sustain for 100 minutes.

Your subplots and B stories are what add new dimensions to your script and flesh out your concept and story. Most stories have at least 2 or 3 subplots, and can have more. But you don’t want them to take AWAY from the main storyline, only add to it!

The first 8-10 pages of your second act is where your main character will face their first major test or challenge and take the first step in their arc. But these pages are also where you should begin introducing and developing your subplots and B stories. Somewhere in pgs 30-40ish.

It’s a fuzzy area, but I actually think there are some differences between a B-STORY and a SUBPLOT. I think B stories usually still directly involve your main character, whereas subplots do not – at least not initially.

The B Story is your character’s secondary motivation or mission – the OTHER thing they have to accomplish. Your B Story may be a second problem or issue that your main character has to fix. And while your A-Story presents itself at the inciting incident and is solidified at the end of the first act with the acceptance of the adventure, your B-Story often can’t be identified UNTIL the second act begins, because it’s what is illuminated by the adventure beginning.

For example, in The Wizard of Oz – Dorothy’s A-Story is to find the Wizard and get home, but the B-Story becomes helping Oz and her new friends. She had no idea she was going to have to do that until the adventure began.

The B Story is often the more emotional thing, and not the visual, tangible, action-y thing. It’s connected to your concept – but is usually caused because of or caused by your concept. It’s what your hook or major storyline leads your characters to (or to do).

For example, in the political comedy Dave, the main storyline is Kevin Kline pretending to be the President and getting away with it while adapting to his very new life as the leader of the free world. But there are two B stories – or perhaps B and C story – the first is the love story with the First Lady. The second B story, perhaps the C story, is that Dave must get this bill passed to save children and cut the budget.

In my company’s own movie, Sydney White, the B story is how Amanda Bynes’s Sydney character affects and helps the “Dorks” characters. She’s still involved, so it’s not really a subplot. It’s a true secondary storyline.

Your B Story could be a love story for your main character (though in a straight romantic comedy, this would always be the A story). Very often, in action or disaster films, the B story is the love story, but it can be in any genre.

Some examples where the B story is the love story include Juno (love story with Michael Cera), Liar Liar (love story with Maura Tierney and winning his wife back is a second mission and motivation to overcoming the issue of not being able to lie), Twister, Armageddon, 2012, Die Hard, etc – all have B love stories.

In contrast, your subplots are basically a way for you to cut away from your main storylines and main characters and infuse different life and personality into your story. These subplots do NOT have to include your main characters, and probably shouldn’t. However, it usually does and SHOULD intersect and affect your major plotline at some point.

It could be your sidekick, best friend, mentor character or antagonist that you’ve introduced us to in the first act, now develops their own slightly separate storyline and goals. Or it could be a totally NEW character that you introduce here.

Your subplots actually can cause or lead to your turning points in your second act if they intersect well with your major storylines.  For instance, in The Ref, the two subplots are the son’s storyline and the Drunken Santa storyline. They eventually intersect and affect the main storyline of Denis Leary and the parents, but they are separate.

In thrillers like Primal Fear, The Negotiator, or Long Kiss Goodnight, the subplots are the behind the scenes politics or overarching stories of corruption, dirty cops, revenge, business, etc. that affect and help drive the main action. In Primal Fear, there’s a real estate subplot that leads to discovery of clues that intersect with the main storyline, but it’s just a subplot and doesn’t directly involve the main characters.

Or the subplot could be the OTHER side of your love story. For example, in Six Days 7 Nights, the major storyline is Anne Heche and Harrison Ford’s love story developing as they try to get rescued, but the subplot is their respective boyfriends/girlfriends back on the mainland as they get closer.

Remember – much like your main ‘A’ storyline, your B stories and subplots should have a set up, a beginning, middle and end – they need a structure – and they need to be resolved. This is done usually by the end of your second act or middle of your third act – but it depends on how big and important the subplot is.

Your B story – your character’s secondary missions – they have to include obstacles just like the A story does. And your subplot MUST have conflict – or else it is not a subplot, it’s just filler! I’ll say that again – if your subplot has no conflict, it’s just filler.

The subplot must also connect with your story’s main theme. In fact, the subplot often drives home the theme even more specifically and obviously than your A storyline. Look at Crazy Stupid Love – had tons of storylines and subplots, but even the smaller subplots of Steve Carrell’s kid’s love life and the funny angry neighbors all added to, and brought out, the theme of the story.

If you have a true ensemble piece – meaning there is pretty equal screen time shared amongst 5-10 different characters, then you don’t need subplots because each of your characters will have their own storyline and those will be more than enough to use to cut away from whatever else is going on, and progress the story. Basically, your whole story is made up of subplots that tie into an overarching concept, story or theme. For example – Crash, Love Actually, New Year’s Eve, Traffic, etc.  But keep in mind that many of these storylines should intersect in some way at some point just like your subplots would.

And if you have created a wonderful subplot on page 32 and introduced new characters, but then we don’t see them again until page 83, then you haven’t tracked that subplot well enough and it will not seem important enough to the story. After your major structural points or turning points, that’s usually a great time to cut away from your main characters and check back in with your subplots.

So as you develop your script, make sure you’re creating and tracking subplots and B stories that are just as compelling as your major storyline so that your concept, hook and theme truly shine.

Danny Manus is an in-demand script consultant and CEO of No BullScript Consulting, and author of “No B.S. for Screenwriters: Advice from the Executive Perspective.” Ranked one of the Top 15 “Cream of the Crop” script consultants in CS Magazine in 2010, he was previously the Director of Development for Clifford Werber Productions (Cinderella Story, Sydney White) and Sandstorm Films (The Covenant, 8MM2), which had a first look deal at Screen Gems. He is also attached to produce several projects independently, is a columnist for Business of Show Institute, and teaches seminars and workshops all across the country. 

Go forward and win!

Logline Service

I have been getting a lot of request for loglines. I give different prices . Since I have so many requests for this service, I decided to set a single fix price.

Logline: $5.00 Flat Fee

A synopsis or summery is required. It well be used to form the logline. The logline is just one line.

Screenplays

Critique: $50.00 Flat Fee, Discount fee $42.50

 Includes evaluating the basis elements of a script

•  Introduction
•  Development
•  Climax
•  Conclusion
• Character development 
•  Mid point development

Critiques also provide suggestions for improvements and enhancement. 

Payments are made by Paypal or cashier check by mail.


Other services are at regular price.

Query Letters: $25.00 Flat Fee  

Editing: $45.00 Flat Fee

•  Evaluating formatting to industry standards
•  Spelling, grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc.

Turnaround time:
Editing: 2 weeks
Critique: 2 weeks

Query Letters: 2 weeks

Feel free to contact me at ahicks4298@q.com or ahicks4298@msn.com.

Feel to call me at (360) 696-4298. Ask for Frances.

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Adapting A Screenplay from Literature

By Michael Rabiger

There is a constantly growing supply of plays, novels, and short stories that might adapt well to the screen. Good literature can however be a quicksand if you assume that the story will make an equally fine film. Effective adaptation may actually be impossible if you can find no cinematic equivalent for the author’s writing style and literary form. A story that relies on a subtly ironic storytelling voice, for instance, might be a bad choice because there is no such thing as ironic photography or recording.

Most of the criteria for judging material for an adaptation remain the same as those used to assess any script:

• Does it tell its tale through externally visible, behavioral means?
• Does it have interesting, well-developed characters?
• Is it contained, specific, and affordable in its settings?
• Are the situations interesting and realizable?
• Is there an interesting major conflict, and is it externally dramatized rather than internal?
• Does the conflict imply interesting metaphors?
• Does the piece have a strong thematic purpose?
• Can you wholeheartedly identify with its theme?
• Can you invent a cinematic equivalency for the story’s literary values?
• Can you afford to do it?
• Is the copyright available?

Go forward and win!

Logline Service

I have been getting a lot of request for loglines. I give different prices . Since I have so many requests for this service, I decided to set a single fix price.

Logline: $5.00 Flat Fee

A synopsis or summery is required. It well be used to form the logline. The logline is just one line.

Screenplays

Critique: $50.00 Flat Fee, Discount fee $42.50

 Includes evaluating the basis elements of a script

•  Introduction
•  Development
•  Climax
•  Conclusion
• Character development 
•  Mid point development

Critiques also provide suggestions for improvements and enhancement. 

Payments are made by Paypal or cashier check by mail.


Other services are at regular price.

Query Letters: $25.00 Flat Fee  

Editing: $45.00 Flat Fee

•  Evaluating formatting to industry standards
•  Spelling, grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc.

Turnaround time:
Editing: 2 weeks
Critique: 2 weeks

Query Letters: 2 weeks

Feel free to contact me at ahicks4298@q.com or ahicks4298@msn.com.

Feel to call me at (360) 696-4298. Ask for Frances.

Film script format, writing film scripts, screenwriting services, coverage service, screenplay formatting margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, Search terms: screenplays, screenwriting service, edit and critique service, writing screenplays, screenplay format, loglines, query letter, film scripts, movie scripts, screenplay format, screenplay synopsis, script synopsis, treatment, proofreading service for writers, novels, writing services, fiction writing, film script format, writing flim scripts, screenwriting service, coverage service, screenplay critique service, screenplay format margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, free writing tutorials,   script consultant, screenwriting jobs, film production companies

Editing is Murder

by JEANNE VEILLETTE BOWERMAN

The email pings. It’s your trusted script consultant. Yes! Maybe she loved your script. You open the message with hope and excitement:

“Script is great… but cut 25 pages.”

Slashing 25 words is one thing, but cutting 25 pages takes an entirely different approach. You’ll need Dexter for that killing spree. But when it’s done, your story will be free of everything that’s dragging it down.

Often people interchange the words “editing” and “rewriting.” Rewriting requires major story analysis, challenging your character development, plot, conflicts and subplots. Editing is the process after the rewrites. With a few tips, you’ll be as efficient as a serial killer.

To perform the perfect murder, you need to know how to clean up the crime scene. Start with the big stuff and wipe the fingerprints last. It’s the same for a script:.

1. Story structure: Have you hit all the turning points of the story? Have you pushed your protagonist to the point of torture? Is there too much fat and not enough action? Is your theme clear?

Take a good look at the story foundation and be brutally honest. Often in a first draft, we beat the reader over the head. Have a writer or trusted advisor read it to identify holes. But to be honest, this step is “rewriting” and should happen long before you start the detailed editing. Just sayin’.

2. Scenes: Each scene has to be meaningful, and hopefully, serve more than one purpose. If all it does is provide exposition of a character or a single plot point, it’s not developed enough.

Take each scene one at a time and ask:

• Does it advance the story?
• Does it add exposition?
• Does it create a new conflict?

If the answer isn’t “yes” to two out of the three questions, sharpen that blade and kill the darling. But if there’s an important piece of exposition, find a way to add it to a different scene.Another trick for cutting scenes is to examine the flow of the story. Put each scene on an index card: Plot A on blue, Plot B on yellow, Plot C on green, etc. Lay them on a table and switch up the order. Some scenes fall away naturally.

*tip: put your dead scenes in a folder. You might need to revive them in later revisions… but ONLY if they work. 

3. Start late and leave early: Now you have the scenes you want, make them late for the party. Once you think you’ve entered the room late enough, enter even later.Challenge each scene to serve its purpose in fewer words. Above all, choose the final line of the scene carefully. Does it leave the audience hanging, needing to know more? It should.

4. Action should mean action: Scripts are entirely different than novels. Less is more. No flowery, self-indulgent, garbage prose. Get to the point. Fast. Cut those adverbs and adjectives. Only write what the audience can see on screen. Period.

5. Talk ain’t cheap: Read every piece of dialogue out loud. Most people write rambling dialogue in early drafts. Make it sound natural in as few words as possible. If you can convey in ACTION what the character is spewing from their mouth, do it.

6. Divide and conquer: Read every line of action and dialogue as a standalone to determine if it is imperative to either the subplot or the main plot. With a 120-page limit (some say 110 is the sweet spot), there’s no room for fluff, except on the peanut butter sandwich.

Script consultant, Marcus Leary, once wrote a post advising screenwriters to use the 140-character Twitter rulewhen writing action and dialogue. Great advice.

7. Simon says, “go backwards”: Screenwriter Holly Nault Pillar taught me the trick of reading the script backwards, one line at a time. This way, you don’t get distracted and pulled into the story. You simply are an editor of words. Ask yourself, “Can this story be told without this line?” The fat will rise to the top.

8. Make it a silent movie: Remove all the dialogue… every single word. Then read the action as if it were a silent movie. This will force you to avoid the “talking heads” problem of exposition via dialogue. See what you can remove from speech and replace with action.

Once the script makes sense as a silent film, add back any dialogue that is needed. You’ll be shocked how much isn’t. Force yourself to be picky. Allow each character only one treat, e.g. a joke or throwaway line, but only one. Trust your audience to get it. Be careful not to use your only file of the script though! Create a new one just for this exercise.

9. Wordsmithing: ScreenwritingU, a top screenwriting instruction site, discussed rewrites in a recent teleconference. Their wordsmithing tips apply to editing too:

Give more meaning with fewer words.

This is the stage to pull out the thesaurus and change “runs quickly” to “dashes”. Or if you have a whole paragraph describing the setting, change it to a small descriptor, such as, “it’s red-neck heaven”.

10. Be quotable: Your script will pop if you create one or two lines an audience will be quoting for years. We’ve all heard Rhett Butler’s line, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn,” more times than Scarlett got married. You need to create that type of line in your own film.

ScreenwritingU recommends finding that opportunity by looking in the most emotional moments of your script. At the height of a moving scene, examine the dialogue. There’s your sweet spot. Make sure the line was set up beforehand and offers perspective, as well as heightening the emotion. FYI, ScreenwritingU periodically does afree teleconference on rewrites. I highly recommend it!

11. You have one chance to make a first impression: The opening lines of your screenplay introduce you as a professional. That first page should show your voice, talent and ability to grab a reader. By “voice” I’m referring to the style of writing that sets you apart from others. What makes your voice different? Don’t imitate other styles, find one that flows from you naturally… and trust it.

Every successful murderer has patience. If I’m too exhausted to edit, I put it down for a few days. It’s okay to walk away. In fact, I encourage it. I never edit a piece I’ve just finished. I’m amazed at the flaws I find a week later. If you are resistant to patience, remember, once a script is out the door and in a producer’s hands, you’ll be in their tracking system. Even if they pass on it, the company labels the quality of your writing. Don’t be a sloppy murderer. Impatience could cost you your career.

By the way, four days after receiving the email, I had cut the 25 pages. The script got tighter… and I didn’t leave fingerprints.

Note: Wednesday, September 12th, The Writers Store screenwriting webinar, 12 Things to Nail Down Before You Start Your Rewrite, is all about rewrites. Don’t miss it! Instructor Tom Benedek, screenwriter of Cocoon, has even more useful advice.

Go forward and win!

Logline Service

I have been getting a lot of request for loglines. I give different prices . Since I have so many requests for this service, I decided to set a single fix price.

Logline: $5.00 Flat Fee

A synopsis or summery is required. It well be used to form the logline. The logline is just one line.

Screenplays

Critique: $50.00 Flat Fee, Discount fee $42.50

 Includes evaluating the basis elements of a script

•  Introduction
•  Development
•  Climax
•  Conclusion
• Character development 
•  Mid point development

Critiques also provide suggestions for improvements and enhancement. 

Payments are made by Paypal or cashier check by mail.


Other services are at regular price.

Query Letters: $25.00 Flat Fee  

Editing: $45.00 Flat Fee

•  Evaluating formatting to industry standards
•  Spelling, grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc.

Turnaround time:
Editing: 2 weeks
Critique: 2 weeks

Query Letters: 2 weeks

Feel free to contact me at ahicks4298@q.com or ahicks4298@msn.com.

Feel to call me at (360) 696-4298. Ask for Frances.

Film script format, writing film scripts, screenwriting services, coverage service, screenplay formatting margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, Search terms: screenplays, screenwriting service, edit and critique service, writing screenplays, screenplay format, loglines, query letter, film scripts, movie scripts, screenplay format, screenplay synopsis, script synopsis, treatment, proofreading service for writers, novels, writing services, fiction writing, film script format, writing flim scripts, screenwriting service, coverage service, screenplay critique service, screenplay format margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, free writing tutorials,   script consultant, screenwriting jobs, film production companies

September 12, 2012:Screenplays Wanted

Hello Everyone,

These "writing gigs" were sent to me by email this morning. So check them out and see what happens

ASIA-BASED PRODUCERS SEEK FEATURE SCRIPTS

Asian-based producers seek completed feature-length scripts that 1) portray heroic Chinese characters 2) portray Chinese culture and/or 3) are set in China in the following genres: action/adventure, thriller or sci-fi. Successful scripts will be produced in China and will be vetted by the government so content should not be anti-government, glorify crime or contain explicit sexuality. Scripts with an identifiable rewrite potential to be set in China may be considered. Material already translated into Mandarin or pre-approved will be given very high priority. Budget is open. Both WGA and non-WGA writers may submit. 

READ MORE HERE:

SEEKING SHORT SCRIPT 

We are DoP/Director team, looking for a live action short script between 5-15 pages. Genre is not important. What counts is that it possesses something that is philosophical and existential, and deeply human. Plot should be interesting but secondary to an underlying, particular theme that is explored, and it would be preferable to have an open or interpretable ending rather than a moralistic, absolute one. Though we are open to meaningful quirkiness and irony, we're not interested in gimmicks, cleverness for the sake of cleverness, and prefer to read something that is personal and uncontaminated by commercial aims. If you have something that might apply, please submit a short paragraph synopsis as opposed to a logline, and not the entire script.

READ MORE HERE:

SEEKING COMEDY CO-WRITER

Looking for someone with broad range in comic styles to contribute to web series pilot. "Outside the box" is good. Please send resume, samples or links, examples of influences/favorite shows and films, as well as some idea of how much time you have to devote to this project. I would like to meet at least once weekly.

READ MORE HERE:

PRODUCTION COMPANY SEEKING INDIE BUDGET SCREENPLAY

We are an up and coming modest production company based in Los Angeles. We are seeking scripts that are low budget and have an independent feel. Preferably in the 1-2 million range. We are interested in all genres except horror and comedy. Please also include a logline and synopsis with the script.

READ MORE HERE:

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The Shorthouse Organisation - Seeking Psychological Thriller 

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"The Shorthouse Organisation is looking for a low- budget feature film script which contains a suspenseful and engaging psychological thriller premise. It must also contain a lead role for a 30s something male and be UK based. The script should be well-structured and scenes should be working on multiple levels. Cinematic visuals, language and action are paramount and dialogue should be used to drive the story and reveal characters.

You will receive a writing credit on the film, a share in the back end profits and remuneration payable on the first day of principal photography. Please send a one page synopsis, tag line, and your biography to emma.alldis@gmail.com Please do not send scripts, these will be asked for if your synopsis fits the funding we have in place."

And here's your free Inktip job lead. It is exclusive to you as a Screenwriting Goldmine subscriber.  

Remember, the only other way you'd see this job lead is by  paying to become an Inktip Subscriber.

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Centrala - Seeking Animation Scripts with Poetic Style

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We are looking for completed feature-length animation scripts intended for a children's audience, i.e. ages approximately 7-12, but with a certain sensibility:  The type of animation style we like is "Up" and the Hayao Miyazaki films.  We are NOT looking for a fast-paced, lighthearted comedy like "Kung Fu Panda," "Megamind" or even "The Incredibles."  Rather, the tone and pace should be more poetic, introspective and mature while still targeted for a young audience.  We are not afraid of difficult subjects in the story.  Also, we prefer stories that allow for more fantastical journeys or worlds.

Budget is open.  Both WGA and Non-WGA writers may submit.

Our credits include 'Ve stinu'

To submit to this lead, please go to: http://www.inktippro.com/leads/

Enter your email address.

Copy/Paste this code: 2hx9hwkq96

NOTE: Please only submit your work if it fits what the lead is looking for exactly.  If you aren't sure if your script fits, please ask InkTip first.

And that's it. 

To your writing!

Go forward and win!

Logline Service

I have been getting a lot of request for loglines. I give different prices . Since I have so many requests for this service, I decided to set a single fix price.

Logline: $5.00 Flat Fee

A synopsis or summery is required. It well be used to form the logline. The logline is just one line.

Screenplays

Critique: $50.00 Flat Fee, Discount fee $42.50

 Includes evaluating the basis elements of a script

•  Introduction
•  Development
•  Climax
•  Conclusion
• Character development 
•  Mid point development

Critiques also provide suggestions for improvements and enhancement. 

Payments are made by Paypal or cashier check by mail.


Other services are at regular price.

Query Letters: $25.00 Flat Fee  

Editing: $45.00 Flat Fee

•  Evaluating formatting to industry standards
•  Spelling, grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc.

Turnaround time:
Editing: 2 weeks
Critique: 2 weeks

Query Letters: 2 weeks

Feel free to contact me at ahicks4298@q.com or ahicks4298@msn.com.

Feel to call me at (360) 696-4298. Ask for Frances.

Film script format, writing film scripts, screenwriting services, coverage service, screenplay formatting margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, Search terms: screenplays, screenwriting service, edit and critique service, writing screenplays, screenplay format, loglines, query letter, film scripts, movie scripts, screenplay format, screenplay synopsis, script synopsis, treatment, proofreading service for writers, novels, writing services, fiction writing, film script format, writing flim scripts, screenwriting service, coverage service, screenplay critique service, screenplay format margins, screenplay writing, screenplay format example, free writing tutorials,   script consultant, screenwriting jobs, film production companies